Mostly Normal Mom

March 22nd, 2013

Impatient

Seriously. Can it be Spring now? Let's see if a new brand-new box of chalk can jump start it...

Also, I have no explanation for Freya's outfit. Maybe she's a trend-setter...

Poke-poke...

Then we attacked the snow with sticks. Because it deserved it. 

March 21st, 2013

Library Play Time

Twice a month, they open up the main meeting room, fill it with toys and children and host a big play date at the Verona Library. They call it "The Young and the Restless." 

This was supposed to be a picture of Shire's face. Instead, I got a picture of her hair style.

So cute. 

March 4th, 2013

Painting

(aka, why is it still winter??)

February 24th, 2013

Happy Birthday Freya!

Lunch, cupcakes, and ice cream and Ella's Deli with mom, dad, sissy, bamma and papa, and aunt KK. A few friends managed to stop by too. A good afternoon. 

January 28th, 2013

Clean-up Crew

Working the levels: Freya does the table, Shire does the chairs, Penny does the floor. Mostly...

January 26th, 2013

PSA

This may be news to some of you, and not for others, but I felt that I had reached a point where I feel ready to put some things down. I know this comes as a shock to many people, and it's easy to feel disoriented and demoralized. I hope that I can find a way to communicate some details to assuage these feelings.

Stewart and I are separating. This is a decision we made back in October, and we've been living with this decision and adjusting our lives accordingly since then. This is not a knock-down, drag-out, burn the bridges kind of situation. This was us (the two of us) finally come to terms with the fact that we do not really work together: specifically, we were not treating each other well and we were not effectively parenting. Nothing (I mean nothing) is more important to me (or Stew) than the quality of our children's lives. And while change like this is scary—it's the scariest thing that I've ever done—I'm able to go forward because I know in my heart that I want the girls to be happy, and part of that means that they deserve to have a mother who is happy.

No matter what, we are thinking of our children first. Our current situation looks like this:

• We each have our own bedroom upstairs.

• I stay home with the girls during the day (like I always have).

• Evenings with the girls are split between Stewart and me, largely to account for the fact that I now have part-time job and am taking a class in the evenings. We also try to arrange some free time for ourselves in the evenings.

• We still do things all together as a family when schedules allow (like taking Shire to “Charlotte's Web” or visit family over the holidays or going to birthday parties, etc)

• We are planning on meeting with a lawyer to officially file for separation in the near future.

• Divorce comes after that, but there are many legal/financial ramifications that need to be worked out before we would consider taking this step. Emotionally and mentally, we are prepared for this.

• We are planning on all living in the house for the foreseeable future, and ideally someone will keep the house.

• I know it's hard for people to picture how two people would continue to live together and not be married. But that's what we're doing. We're still there for each other (in a friend capacity) if someone is having a hard day. We do our best to be nice to each other (for lack of another word). And now that we're not trapped under the weight of a failing marriage, I feel that we both are able to just breathe easier. Tensions are not high, hackles are not raised, and tempers are not flared. It's pretty good stuff.

Meanwhile, life goes on. I'm doing a fairly good job of accepting myself. I know (in my heart) that we're are all going to come out of this okay, and that is a great comfort for an anxiety-prone person like me. It's been hard for me to feel like I've lost the support of people around me. I know this comes from lack of understand, not necessarily lack of love. But it's still there, palpably.

I hope that this helps you understand our situation, and that with understanding can maybe come acceptance. This may not be the path that you would have chosen, but it is the path that we chose. If this is the first you're hearing about this, I hope that I've managed to communicate this is a respectful, thoughtful way. If you already knew this, maybe we can start fresh?

Please feel free to comment or ask questions anonymously, and I will to my best to respond. And now, back to our regularly scheduled mostly-normal life. 

 

October 1st, 2012

Lunch Time

August 30th, 2012

What a Mess

Ugh, parenting is so messy. After this, I carried both the baby and high chair together out to the front yard and hosed them off. I should really live in a house that has hose hook-ups inside and can be just sprayed and mopped daily. That would help. 

August 7th, 2012

A post not about Children 

So this is just a little photo evidence for you to laugh at involving me doing stupid athletic things with some of my more athletic associates. This one was called the Rugged Maniac, and it's a 5k course with 18 different obstacles (a lot of climbing and crawling. A little mud, water, and fire as well). As of this point, Stewart has made the excellent decision not to participate in this kind of mass sado-masochist activity, but he might be convinced to do the next Zombie run with us next year. We'll see.

So I went to Wilmont, WI with Chuck, Katie, Galen, Beth, Chris, and Liam this weekend. Chris and Liam were just there as spectators (obviously, since Liam is 3). As far as I remember, I finished the race in around 54 minutes. 

Here we are, being rock stars before the race. Can you tell how hot and sunny it was already at 8:30 am? 

Showing off the backs of our shirts, which I made. They're supposed to be funny/awesome (that is, if you get the Magic: the Gathering reference...which nobody did other than the dorky guy working the front desk at the hotel). 

At the starting line, waiting to go. Surrounding by other hot, nervous people. 

Look at me: I'm trotting! And totally about to pass that 55-year-old lady. Rock on.

Here I am going over one (of many) obstacles like this. Lots of climbing. 

The next time the camera (Chris) saw me was after the 3-mile mark. Here I am after crawling through this tiny underground tunnel for what seemed like 20 minutes (dude, I'm completely clausterphobic for the record...)

Here we are after the race, under a tiny patch of shade, 80% passed out. Apparently I was the only person that had cleaned up at this point. And that was my weekend. I have a ton of bruises/scratches and every muscle in my body is sore, but it was a fun experience nonetheless. 

July 23rd, 2012

Busy Summer

So it's been busy. We had our 5 year wedding anniversary in June, and my 29th birthday was last week. Lots to celebrate and do, not so much time for photos. These pictures are going to go in reverse chronological order. 

Scrambled eggs and cheese. A typical mid-morning (or anytime) snack. 

From my birthday party last weekend. It was '80s theme. Also, I got my hair cut (for the first time in a year...woah).

Finger painting with Liam.

Shire showing off her shield from her "Knights and Dragons" themed birthday party (which was also Liam and Sophie's party). Gotta love what you can do with cardboard and duct tape.

Classic Freya manuever, the "Reach and Whine." Haha. And that's all for now since the children are staging a mutiny as a speak (type).